pardon the ramen soup stains

You know what I didn't even realize until now? That last post? It was the 100th.

I'm in the middle of being elated at the fact that I have such a self-sacrificing friend. Dominic is going to try to switch out of gym into desktop publishing. I've tried to give him a fair warning, but he said he would do it to save us from the boredom. Plus, he thinks it sounds interesting. I learn new things about him everyday. I just told him we talk about him. Let's see how this goes over.

But today feels really fresh. I'm kind of glad we had school today, so we could bring in the new all together. The Inaugural Address was good, in general my classes are good, and the snow flurries flying outside my window? That's good too. Plust the two hour delay in school tomorrow. And the fact that I'm writing again. I haven't done that in weeks. It feels good to put pen to moleskine notebook paper.

It's a short post, but I felt like posting something. I think it's a new day. A new post was needed.

Heather

but I'm feeling happy

all mexican food-ed out

What did we have for dinner? Burritos. My mother couldn't pick a day when I hadn't already had mexican food, no! She had to pick the day I go to Habeneros. People keep saying Habs and it's really annoying. Just say the whole thing!

So I decided to start journaling. Just writing whatever I'm thinking when I decide to write. I'm going to take to carrying it around with me at school, too. Because I want to be Hank and John and read it ten years later and laugh. From what he read, I think that John's could be turned into a book. Not a very good one, but a funny one. So maybe one day mine can? Actually, no. That's not why I'm writing it. I just want to be able to reminisce ten years from now.

The first entry just talks about what I've just said. How I want to journal for the sake of memories. And I'm going to make a point of not mentioning Amy or Natasha in it at all. =)

"People get mad when you tell them you wouldn't cry if they died."
"Wow, I hope I didn't learn that from experience"

Actually, come to think of it. This blog is kind of my journal. Hmm. Wow, that makes me feel all warm and fuzzy and sentimental inside. For real.

My parents are going to play pool tonight. Which makes me think of Walker and his special pool skills. I miss that pool table. I've actually been thinking about random things I'd forgotten about governor's school a lot lately. Random memories and stuff. I think I want to make more memories that good this summer. That's one of my new year's resolutions--make lots and lots of memories. Make my high school years truly the best in my life. Have experiences to write about.

I figure I should just reveal my resolutions slowly, over a period of time. Because I haven't even thought of some of them yet.

that's all really. I was just tired of looking at that post.

Heather

All these things I hate

I hate how little things change with the new year. Everything feels exactly the same and I'm not sure I want that.

I also hate how I'm debating actually finishing my application and sending it in. I mean, I really really really want to go, but I know that even if I do get in, I probably won't be able to, and I'm not sure it's the best idea to go, but I just loved it so much those two weeks and want to do that for two years. In a weird way, I felt more at home there than I have anywhere else my entire life. Plus, the people were just so much more accepting of you weirdness because they're all weird.

And if you went I would miss you and don't know what I would do without you.

So I'm trying to just do it and get it done and if it's not that great then it doesn't matter because then it's easier for me to decide.

That's the only thing that changed with the new year. Not wanting to send in my application.

I'm not going to make resolutions out loud this year because I want to do them myself. And because I don't want other people knowing that I didn't accomplish them. Because then I feel bad because emilea is a better person than I am. (You so are. You're the best person I know).

But I will make one out loud (or in writing, in a public-ish venue, on the internet):

1) Next year, we are TOTALLY celebrating New Year's Eve in a Waffle House. And you know what we'll talk about? The road trip.

hope I didn't freak you out,
Heather

wear your heart on your sleeve, make things hard to believe.

(Also, I hate how much I still like him even though we've had nearly zero contact for over a month and how much I fell for him to begin with even though he was across the country. And I hate how he gives hugs, because it makes me like him more. I hate that)